“Do I Have To?”…. “Of Course I Will!”

Hey, Mom! There's something green and yucky smelling all over the garage."

Lots of strange things happen during Christmas vacation when everyone is home 24/7, so this announcement wasn't completely shocking.

However, I chose to proceed with caution. Cracking open the door to the garage, my senses were instantly hit with conflicting input. Brightly popping, snapping, happy sounds belied fact that ghost buster green liquid was actually binge-eating the garage floor. On the other hand, the nose-crinkling stench fit the situation perfectly. My jaw hit the ground. Where to start?

Having fallen off an upper shelf, the offending gallon jug of acid was still tipped and belching its contents. As I stood there in a stupor, the spill was seeping under a freezer and bending around the tires of a parked vehicle.

Eventually, gloves were located in order to set the jug upright. Then I retreated back into the house to regroup.

Knowing my husband was working out of cell range, I called the next superhero in the area---my father-in-law. With Mom calling out ideas in the background, the dynamic duo directed their distressed daughter-in-law to neutralize the acid with baking soda.

Eight boxes of baking soda later, SuperDad leaned on the shovel he had been using to scoop the mess into a bucket.

"Now what?" he asked.

Surveying the disaster zone around us, I said, "Well, a good wife would haul all the rubber mats out, move the freezer, and scrub down what's left of the acid-soda residue."

"And a bad wife would...?" he asked.

I grinned. "A bad wife would say, 'Hmm...my husband has the day off tomorrow. He could finish cleaning this up.' "

Dad laughed, moved the freezer for me, and waved as he headed back to what he had unselfishly dropped to rush to my rescue.

And I stood there trying to decide if I was a good wife or a bad wife.

Eventually my college-age daughter took the rest of the children to play basketball at an indoor gym so I could don my grubby hoodie and finish the clean job.

Now, I am not writing this to say I am a good wife. Ah nah. I am writing this because the thought process experienced during the scrubbing and hauling was life-changing to me.

Why am I doing this?

Because my sweetheart has so little time to call his own right now. I don't want to strap him with a terrible, unplanned clean up job on his day off just because I'd rather sit in front of the fire and read a book.

But I really, really, REALLY don't want to be doing this. It's cold. It's dirty. It's stinky. These rubber mats are big and heavy and floppy and throw me around. The cement isn't responding well to my scrubbing. Am I really doing any good?

Why would I be putting myself through this experience on purpose?

Sitting back on my haunches, I paused mid-scrub.

Huh. Because I love my husband.

I guess real love motivates us to do things we don't want to do.

Stay up till midnight to pick up a child from a sports event.

Clean up the fifteenth potty training accident since lunch (with a smile????).

Single-handedly care for spouse, family, home, and life in general when spouse's health abruptly changes.

Place a necessary boundary on a teenager even though you know severe push back is inevitable.

Intentionally serve the one that openly proclaims to despise you.

Sprint to the nearest toilet with toddler tucked under one arm while catching a round of vomit in your other hand.

Okay, that last one was also motivated by a strong distaste for carpet scrubbing.

But in the end, real love MUST motivate us to do all kinds of difficult things.

In the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus Christ prayed, "O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as thou wilt." (Matt. 26:39) Love for His Father and for us moved Him forward, and the Savior’s Atonement for the sins of all mankind is the "greatest expression of love the world has ever known".

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin once said, "Love is the beginning, the middle, and the end of the pathway of discipleship....

"The gospel of Jesus Christ is a gospel of transformation. It takes us as men and women of the earth and refines us into men and women for the eternities.

"The means of this refinement is our Christlike love.

"In the end, the development of such love is the true measure of success in life." (emphasis added)

Development implies that this is the work of a lifetime. So maybe I don’t have to feel completely rotten every time I stand at a cross roads and try to rustle up enough love to motivate me past "Do I have to?" and on to "Of course I will!".